Left Alone In The Dark
by Heartaches and Cheap Wine
Summary: How dare he leave her? He was all she had left! She wasn’t going to cry, not for him. SamOC Warnings Inside! I Suck at summaries. Please reveiw. I return the favour!


**Warnings: Suicide, language.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, just my imagaination.**

**A/N: Please hit the review button, I cant improve if you dont! **

Left Alone In The Dark

_There are many ways to deal with pain. This is just a few….._

Alexis looked at the cold stone and fought back the tears. She gazed at the name and bit down on her lip. How dare he leave her? He was all she had left! She wasn't going to cry, not for him. She pulled her jacket closer around her and sighed. She toed the ground then walked away.

She opened the door to the motel and sat down on the bed with a bottle of whiskey. She carefully discarded the cap and took a swig. Then another. Then another. The liquor burned a path down her throat as she gulped down mouthful after mouthful. Alexis' vision was blurry but, by this point, she couldn't tell if it was the tears or the whiskey. The far off sound of _Everlong _ by the Foo Fighters pulled her from her sad reverie. _my phone _ she wiped her eyes. _have to get to the phone. _Auto-pilot sent her in the direction of the noise and she picked up the phone. "Hello?" she did her best to sound sober. "yeah, it is." she wiped her hand across her eyes. She threw the phone down on the bed and fell after it. Movement from the other side of the room caught her eye. She looked above the dresser and saw her face. Her ocean blue eyes stood out against her pale, gaunt, skin and her full lips were thinner and paler. Her long black hair was matted and tied back haphazardly. She was thinner than usual and her eyes had red circles under them. She sat up barley recognising the girl in the mirror and walked over to the dresser. She touched the photograph of them. He had let her into his life. Showed her what he did. Died doing it. She threw the picture across the room and heard the glass shatter into a million pieces like her heart had done on the day he had left her. She braced herself against the dresser and sighed as she slipped down it. She shook as the tears feel freely from her eyes for the first time since he had died. Hugging her legs close to her body she curled up trying to stop the aching in her heart. The door rattled and she looked up. She felt safe where she was in the little space between the wall and the dresser. The door opened and two men walked in, "Alex?" his voice was soft. She locked eyes with him from her hiding place and he knelt down beside her and pulled her close, she let him. "its ok" he soothed "It's ok".

He sat on the floor with her gently rocking her back and forward. He didn't smell like his brother but she loved the contact. He shifted slightly and sat on the floor but didn't let her go. She didn't want him to. "Dean." she breathed as her tears slowed. He angled his head to look at her. He smiled a small smile and she grabbed hold of his jacket. " I want Sammy." her breath came out in small shuddering gasps as she felt her heart break again.

"I know sweetheart I know." he whispered as she shifted so she could move into him. She remembered hearing two people enter the room and looked up. Her sadness turned to rage when she looked at the man sitting on the bed. That bed was hers and Sam's. He had no right to be there. After all this was his fault. She wriggled from Dean's grasped and launched herself on the older man. Dean was on his feet his arms wrapped around her waist cradling her to him. "You bastard this is your fault!!!! He's gone!" she broke down, violently shaking, Dean's strong arms the only thing keeping her on her feet. John walked towards her.

"how is this my fault you're the one who charged right on in!" he snarled and her hand came up and smacked him hard. Dean pulled her closer as she tried to strike out again. Using his own strength as well as hers Dean flipped Alexis around in his arms and pulled her to him. He glared at his father like he had done in the stony silence of the car.

_March 18__th__ 2007_

"_Sam please don't do this," she begged him taking his large hands in hers. He looked deep into her eyes. "baby I'll be ok." he kissed her head and she held onto him tightly. "Sammy," she pleaded as tears fell down her cheeks. He smiled a small smile and held her close to him. "Dean thinks this is a bad idea Sammy please just stay home tonight with me. Please!" she held him tightly as he rested his head on hers. "Dad says it'll be ok and Dean will be there he wont let anything happen you know that!" his voice was soft and gentle as he stroked her back. "Come back to me Sammy," she demanded and took his lips in a vicious kiss. The motel room door opened and John and Dean walked in. Dean threw the bag on the table and huffed. John shot him a death glare and Dean rose to the challenge. "This is stupid dad!" he roared and John seemed genuinely taken aback by his eldest sons sudden outburst. _

_"You can stay here then." he replied simply, _

_"what? While you drag my little brother to face God only knows what yeah like hell I will," he looked at Sam and smiled apologetically at Alexis. She let go of Sam. "I love you," she whispered and he walked back to her and turned her around sweeping her into his arms and kissed her deeply. _

_"I love you too baby". after he had gone she fell to her knee's in floods of tears._

_Something was wrong they should be back by now. She sighed and walked to the door picking up her car keys and slamming the door._

_Alexis gasped as she got out of the car. The house was ablaze. She screamed and ran. She spotted Dean wrestling with his father as his father held him back. She ran up to them. "where is he!?" she yelled and Dean glared at his father. Two fire fighters called out and they turned around. She ran up to him. His face was dark with ash and his breathing was quick. She took him in her arms as they laid down in the grass. Two sparkling blue eyes gazed up at her and she kissed him. His hand slid weakly around her neck. _

_"I-I lov-" he tried to get out but she pressed her fingers to his lips. _

_"shhh Sammy." she smiled and he shook his head, _

_"I nee- I need to tell you" he began chocking and she smoothed his hair out of his face. _

_"no you don't you can tell me later Sammy we have get you well" she smoothed his hair with her hand and kissed him slowly. _

_"Lexie listen to me I love you and I need you ,you mean the world to me" his breath was coming in ragged gasped and she held him closer. _

_"Hey I know nothing's gonna happen to you its going to be ok" she soothed. Dean was pacing ready to hit John. "Don't you dare leave me Sammy!" she begged for the second time that night. Sam's eyes fluttered closed. She hit him on the chest and he opened his eyes. _

_"never". Dean was yelling for someone to get their "freaking ass over here" and John was looking at Sam. "__Cause you're my, you're my, my true love, my whole heart Please don't throw that away Cause I'm here for you Please don't walk away, Please tell me you'll stay, stay " Sam's voice cracked as he sang the words and she felt him go limp in her arms. _

_"Sam? " she shook him. "Sam?!" she shook him again. "SAM!" she yelled and began to shake. "Sammy? No. no. no. no. please God NO!" Alexis held him close and kissed his head gently._

Dean pulled her into him and stroked her head. He glared at his father and John left. Dean kissed Alexis' hair and lifted her to the bed. She snuggled into Sam's pillow and Dean sighed. "I'll be next door if you need me" he whispered and she nodded.

"Dean?" she asked as he got to the door.

"yeah?" he turned around to her. "you're an amazing person Dean. Thanks for the past week." he smiled the first genuine smile referring to their routine. She would break down and he would hold her. This however was the first time she had actually cried. Dean winked at her and closed the door. Alexis picked up the forgotten bottle of whiskey and walked to wards the bathroom. Stopping at the photo she picked that up too and walked into the bathroom.

After she had run the bath she climbed in without turning the taps off. She settled into the way too warm water and held the photograph in her hands. She removed a piece of glass and did something she hadn't done since she was at Stanford. Since he stopped her. Since he held her and let her cry. There was no-one now. She was all alone. He had left her alone in this dark place. She dragged the splinter of glass down her arm and hissed softly at the bittersweet pain. The crimson blood dripped into the water and she took a swig of whiskey. Her left wrist got a matching cut and she sighed leaning back. "I'm coming Sammy." she whispered as her world went black.

Something was wrong and Dean knew it. He raced next door and knocked. No answer. He knocked again. Still no answer. He picked the lock and noticed the puddle outside the bathroom door. "GOD NO!" he called as he ran to the door hastily opening it. He gasped as he noticed the words on the wall. He raced to the tub and pulled her up. It was no use she was gone. Her lips were blue and her pupils dilated. He held her in his arms and pulled her out if the tub. Wrapping her in a towel he called his dad. He sweetly kissed her head. "say hi to him for me". he looked at the wall and allowed the tear to fall.

_I'm sorry_

_I have failed you this time._

_xxx_


End file.
